Fried Chicken

Three convicts escape from prison. They make it to a nearby town but are confronted by a policeman. "Hey, aren't you those three escaped convicts?” asked the policeman. Thinking on his feet the first convict looked around him and said "No, I'm Mark, Mark Spencer". The second followed his lead and said, "My name is William, W H Smith". The third said "My name is Ken.....TuckyFriedChicken".

Little Manu and the Teacher

Teacher: Why are you late?
Manu: Because of the sign.
Teacher: What sign?
Manu: The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow."

Teacher: Manu, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.
Manu: Me!

Teacher: Manu, how do you spell "crocodile"?
Manu: "K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L"
Teacher: No, that's wrong
Manu: Maybe it's wrong, but you ask me how I spell it!

Teacher: "Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE?"
Manu: "Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day same time."

The Bathtub Test :

During a visit to the mental asylum, a visitor asked the Director what the criterion was which define whether or not a patient should be institutionalized.

“Well,” said the Director, “we fill up a bathtub, then we offer a teaspoon, a teacup and a bucket to the patient and ask him or her to empty the bathtub.”

“Oh, I understand,” said the visitor. “A normal person would use the bucket because it’s bigger than the spoon or the teacup.”

“No.” said the Director, “A normal person would pull the plug. Do you want a bed near the window?”

A road to Heaven

A preacher dies, and when he gets to Heaven, he sees a New York cab driver who has more crowns. He says to an angel, "I don't get it. I devoted my whole life to my congregation."
The angel says, "We reward results. Did your congregation always pay attention when you gave a sermon?"
The preacher says, "Once in a while someone fell asleep."
The angel says, "Right. And when people rode in this guy's taxi, they not only stayed awake, but they usually prayed!"